Today, my daughter turns 2 years old. She was born under the Krittika star (Plaeides constellation), in the month of Vaikasi, a couple years ago. Life of course hasn't been the same since. She took a long time deciding to come to me. They always say, the wait has definitely been worth it. That's true. But more importantly, waiting for her has changed me as a person. The best part of having had to wait is knowing, what I would otherwise have lost precious years figuring out, what she means to me, what she really is.
I hear you ask, so what is she really? Apart from being a lovable little minx who chatters nineteen-to-the-dozen, gets her way around most people, makes friends with cats and dogs and pigeons and caterpillars, feeds crows and houseflies (yes), blows kisses to strangers (sigh), who calls me by name, with a twinkle in her eyes and who's forever setting up danger zones with water she's generously pouring all over the house... I think about this little bundle of energy and wisdom and happiness. You know what she really is? She is my pole star, my conscience. The daughter who made a mother out of a woman.
Which brings me to this blog. This has been in my head ever since my first few days with N. I envision this as a space that will keep me honest as a mom. Make me stick to first principles through shaky roads. That will help clear my head. Will be my support system as I always put my baby first. Also, there's this thing. There's a clear BeforeBaby/AfterBaby to my life. One moment, I was chugging along just fine. Before I knew it, I was seeing children as never before, seeing situations as never before, painfully aware without even trying as to how that thing would affect them in the years to come. And I want to share this new understanding. Well, if nothing else, just a little love, a little wisdom, a little rant - something that will document the adventures of my not-so-shiny (stained-with-curd-rice-most-of-the-time) new avatar.
PS: For you, baby. Happy birthday. Life and love.
I hear you ask, so what is she really? Apart from being a lovable little minx who chatters nineteen-to-the-dozen, gets her way around most people, makes friends with cats and dogs and pigeons and caterpillars, feeds crows and houseflies (yes), blows kisses to strangers (sigh), who calls me by name, with a twinkle in her eyes and who's forever setting up danger zones with water she's generously pouring all over the house... I think about this little bundle of energy and wisdom and happiness. You know what she really is? She is my pole star, my conscience. The daughter who made a mother out of a woman.
Which brings me to this blog. This has been in my head ever since my first few days with N. I envision this as a space that will keep me honest as a mom. Make me stick to first principles through shaky roads. That will help clear my head. Will be my support system as I always put my baby first. Also, there's this thing. There's a clear BeforeBaby/AfterBaby to my life. One moment, I was chugging along just fine. Before I knew it, I was seeing children as never before, seeing situations as never before, painfully aware without even trying as to how that thing would affect them in the years to come. And I want to share this new understanding. Well, if nothing else, just a little love, a little wisdom, a little rant - something that will document the adventures of my not-so-shiny (stained-with-curd-rice-most-of-the-time) new avatar.
PS: For you, baby. Happy birthday. Life and love.
Kudos for starting the blog Deeps! Amidst your PhD thesis, taking care of N and the fam, it's amazing you find time to write! And we love this new avatar (we love curd rice too) :P
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